the hours weren't, objectively, that bad: mostly 12 hour days, 5 days a week. ok, i know. for a normal person this wouldn't be tolerable. but i thought that i'd been acclimated to working crazy hours. i mean, didn't i used to take every 4th night OB call in santa rosa, staying in the hospital close to 30 hours straight? yes, i did. i actually can't imagine doing that all over again. like one of the vans in the BRR this weekend (see below), i want to ask: what was i thinking?
this is definitely easier than my family medicine residency in that regard. for that, i'm grateful. there's the same lack of control over my schedule, which i think was the hardest part for me both the first and second times around.
i don't think i've ever outlined in a previous post where i'm headed with all this. recently, this has become much clearer after realizing what kind of environment i want to work in for the long term. it's been fun to be at this big university hospital: diversity in the types of people and specialities represented. overall, it's a good environment for learning. however, there's an element of depersonalization that can occur in such a big institution. if my next job is at a big university hospital, that'll be fine. but i would be happy to be at a small place as well. (this assumes that i will always have a hosptial-based career)
my ultimate goal is to work as faculty at a family medicine residency program, teaching family practice docs how to be better at managing acute patients. ideally, i'd love to have part-time responsibilities doing inpatient medicine, emergency medicine and [maybe if i can stand it] a little clinic too. i'm still [mostly] a family doc at heart: i love the relationship-focused model of family practice as well as it's emphasis on community health. that being said, my interest, medically speaking, is acute and emergency care. i hope to find a job where i can bring this all together in a neat package and continue to teach residents.
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